7.24.18

Hi.

Hello. It’s me.

(Haallloooww from the other side).

It always feels weird coming back from an unannounced, unintended break. Partially because you don’t know whether to jump back in or address it; partially because you wonder what to say regardless. But mainly because it’s 2018, and in the blogging sphere, I don’t know if anyone actually noticed. Being dramatic and extra (do people still say extra?), I’d love to adorn myself in rubies and throw myself at the blogging sarcophagus, but I’ll spare everyone my eccentricities (for now) and just get to it.

The more things change, the more they remain the same.

When I take these blogging breaks, it’s never because I’ve tired of writing. On the contrary, I actually write more during break periods; it simply never makes it to the public eye. When I go radio silent, I simultaneously become internally loud (or perhaps I go radio silent because I’ve become internally loud, but that’s a self-important conundrum for another time). Whatever the case may be, if you fancy yourself a writer, you know what I mean. When you’re careful to curate the words you put out, eloquence can be mighty hard to muster when you add a little bit of private turmoil, especially when you pride yourself and your words on being “real” (whatever the hell that even means anymore) and “transparent.” Over the last fourteen (!!) years of blogging, via one medium or another, I’ve managed to take multiple breaks, most of them unannounced, most of them for the same reasons. In the end, I always miss writing and sharing and occasionally over-sharing and pissing people off and rallying the troops and telling Sasquatch dream stories and belonging to a community of badass people, which is exactly what has happened this time. Once you can extinguish some toxicity, it’s much easier to be open and transparent without feeling like a fraud. And I feel like I’m there.

To make a long story short …

(please, someone understand my Clue reference)

All that said, finally: I’m happy to be writing again in a way that I want to share. It’s exciting.

Now. Here are some things that are/will be happening.

  • I’m going to Albany, New York in August.
  • Then to Anchorage, Alaska in September.
  • Football season is almost here, and if you know me, you know I’m jump-up-and-down excited.

  • I’m making a quilt, which is cool. My mom is the last remaining quilt maker on her side, and I’ll be damned if I let something so cool that has been passed down for multiple generations fade away because of me.
  • I was a basic bitch and bought a lottttttt of stuff from the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, with the caveat that I’ll return probably half of it after I try it on. Just wait, this will be one of those magical moments that happens every seven years in which everything you try on looks whimsical and then I’ll just be broke.
  • I’ve been eating a s’more every night before bed, and that really seems to boost team morale.
  • I’ve managed to both slow down and speed up my life. I deemed the last six months of 2018 as “The (half-) Year of Yes.” Yes to the things I would have, in the past, shrugged off or half-assed or simply denied. That’s how I ended up with a ticket to Alaska. These last lingering months of 2018 will be my YOLO months, my YES months, my glow months. ’bout damn time.

That’s just the tip of the iceberg. Now that I’m feeling back to normal and more like myself, who knows what I’ll end up doing. Like David Bowie said, “I don’t know where I’m going, but I promise, it won’t be boring.”

(or maybe it will. whatever. I’ll still write about it.)

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